Sometimes I wake up in the middle of the night with a blood sugar so low that all I can do is moan “LOW” over and over again until Jeremy wakes up, jumps out of bed, and gets me some juice. Juice boxes have gone really cheap since the last time you had one. Those straws are junk, especially at two AM.
And then other times, I wake up in the wee hours with a headache so bad that all I can do is moan “head”
Sunday, 06/28/2009 - Written by Angela at 6:33 am - No Comments - Diabetes, Our Little World - Permalink
I am, but I don’t call myself one. There are actually many reasons for my position, but this is only one: in my neck of the woods, “Christian” is almost synonymous with “ignorant, lazy lemming.”
We have a “Christian” radio station up here, about which I have ranted before. But that was a couple of years ago, so I - very briefly - gave them a second chance today. The only thing I heard before I choked and turned the dial was a commercial:
“Last year, my son was diagnosed with diabetes. It’s been a learning experience for all of us. We do everything we can to keep his insulin levels stable, but sometimes he gets hungry, ravenously hungry, because his body needs fuel.”
I’m not going to bother writing how they slanted this into “we should be as hungry for God” - because every single fact about diabetes in this sentence is WRONG. Factually incorrect. So, that’s it for ignorant.
And as for lazy? Google. All you need to do is sign onto the internet, and Google diabetes. NO REPUTABLE WEBSITE IN THE ENTIRE WORLD WILL TELL YOU THAT THE GOAL OF A DIABETIC IS TO MANAGE HIS INSULIN LEVELS. The false statement about getting ravenously hungry because of diabetes is a little harder to research. But diabetics manage their BLOOD SUGAR you ignorant, lazy lemming!!
Lemming? Obviously, not one single person at that station concerned himself with one lonely, solitary fact. It sounded good (although, no, it didn’t), and some white man with an audibly square jaw and a son (OMGosh!) was saying it, so it must, must be completely true! Follow the ignorant leader everyone! Come on now! Follow!
Funny, you’d think Christians would know that the Bible has some choice words about teachers who lead their little lemmings astray….
I started paying attention to my body about the same time I started taking insulin; although, it wasn’t much of a choice, because the symptoms of low blood sugar are not possible to ignore. Part of the diabetes training is nutrition, especially along the lines of carbohydrate counting. And since I was constantly eating carbs and then dosing with insulin, I could not help but notice the cause-and-effects.
Carb cause-and-effects eventually led to me notice the effects of other foods. And because of this, over the course of a couple of years, Jeremy and I have cut out maybe 90% of the processed foods we eat. We’re pretty much limited to pizza and Chinese now (Chinese hardly ever though), and then sometimes we eat store cookies. Although, I have to say, as you start to eat better, your palate becomes much more sensitive to the junk in cheap bakery food, and it doesn’t taste any good at all. A cookie made with a chemical substitute for butter is just not worth eating anymore. I want the REAL thing, thank you very much.
As we started eating better, I started feeling better. And then I started adding huge amounts of water, half my body weight each day, in fact. I felt good. And as I started paying more attention to what my body was telling me, I got better at reading it. About a year ago, I realized that my throat would start burning after Jeremy used the after-shower spray on the tub. Ditto for the 409 he uses as a “spot-cleaner” elsewhere in the house. So now we use Method after-shower spray and I clean with a 2-1 mixture of water and vinegar.
And now. Enter Life With Diabetes Problem Number 5231: Dry Skin. I’ve had diabetes long enough now that some of the side-problems are starting to crop up. My skin started getting very, very dry about three winters ago, but I did find a product that controls it well - Aveeno lotion. However, this is only the second winter I’ve been plagued by absolutely uncontrollable dandruff, and I haven’t been able to find anything that touches it. I started wondering about the sodium sulfates in my shampoo, so I switched to the Burt’s Bees line of haircare products, but, although I LOVE the stuff (oh my gosh, the conditioners are amazing, my hair just soaks it completely up!), it doesn’t seem to be making a difference with my scalp.
So here’s where I go over the deep end, diving head-first into a swimming pool full of granola…. although, it actually started as a budget thing. Those Burt’s Bees bottles are $9 a pop, and I go through two conditioners a month. It’s a huge budget-buster. I already know that I don’t like the cheap stuff, so I started wondering about making my own shampoo. And I went online and found some recipes. Peppermint and tea tree oil are both big dandruff-fighters - and I actually found a recipe in which I can use both - and I found a bar of soap that is made with 100% olive oil - and I can thus control absolutely every ingredient in my shampoo. Nothing irritating, I can put in as much of the therapeutic ingredients as I need, and it is CHEAP. I figure I can get out of this for as little as $5 per month, just to experiment. If it works well, I can buy the components in larger quantities and save even more.
I think someone should model a super-hero after me. Vinegar disinfectant and olive oil soap, artificial eye lenses/insulin pump/CGM, homemade shampoo… Earthy-crunchy Bionic Budget Woman.
That’s me.
Thursday, 01/15/2009 - Written by Angela at 9:11 pm - No Comments - Diabetes, Our Little World - Permalink
I have homework to do. I’m not in the mood, yet I know it needs to get done so that I am free to practice for church this weekend. So I stall until I cannot stall anymore.
We spent every night last week (except Tuesday) and ALL WEEKEND painting the house. It is done as far as it can be, considering that the doors/casings and baseboard are not in. I had never painted a room without upper trim before; nevertheless, the quality of the cutting in along the ceiling is superb, if I do say so myself.
I LOVE MY JOB. I do not paint for a living.
My appointment with the retinal specialist last weekend went very, very well. My extremely myopic eyes are apparently very healthy for eyes so very myopic; ditto for the seven-years-diabetic aspect. My chance of retinal detachment is approximately 3%, which is as low as it gets for such a high myope / low as it gets for a diabetic - and retinal detachment is only a big problem when it goes untreated and causes scarring, which will not happen because I am going to have so MANY appointments after surgery.
Absolutely no signs of diabetic retinopathy, even after seven years. That’s what you get with an HbA1C of 5.8, thank you very much. And Steven the assistant was a riot.
For some reason, strangers tend to think I’m laid-back. I love it when they tell me that. I get a huge kick out of it, as does anyone nearby who knows me at all.
Tile went in today, grout happens tomorrow. We’ve had some adventures with that. Actually, it’s pretty good that this is the first “adventure” we’ve had since we obtained financing. BNB Builders are awesome. The best testimonial I can give is that we are still married at month four of a two-month project, with our twelve-foot-wide living room reduced to half for the past three weeks. That room contains a bookcase, two easy chairs, a desk, a desk-height filing cabinet, a small table and a PIANO… and we are still married.
Thank you. ::Deep bow::
Grrr, homework….
Tuesday, 09/16/2008 - Written by Angela at 7:43 pm - No Comments - Diabetes, HomeWork, Our Little World - Permalink
Just published in the New England Journal of Medicine yesterday (two months too late for me!!), this study confirms what I told my insurance company. But now it’s official.
Dear BCBS of VT,
I will be waiting by my phone for your apology.
Love, Angela
Since our readers are an educated bunch (why do they come here?), I’m going to solicit comments on this second-level appeal letter to my insurance company. Good? Bad? Effective? Not? Please help:
June 1, 2008
To Whom it May Concern:
This is a second-level letter of appeal for coverage of the Medtronic Minimed Continuous Glucose sensors. Coverage was first denied ____, again on ___.
Lying in bed this morning, in the middle of giving myself a small pat on the back because I realized I’m considering lowering the “high” alarm on my CGM from 170 to 160 (the pat on the back stemmed from the original level of 240 when I started using the CGM over a year ago), I decided not to wait for another HbA1C before registering this second appeal. My health is my primary concern, not yours; therefore I needn’t bother waiting - I will simply address your reasons for denying coverage.
In the latest denial of coverage, you first quote the [health insurance company] Certificate of Coverage: “In addition to the specific exclusions listed elsewhere in this Contract, the following general exclusions apply… Services or medications we determine are not Medically Necessary…” I have shown you that my doctor believes this device is necessary and that my HbA1C and blood glucose profile have drastically improved with its use. Since tighter BG control prevents costly diabetic complications, the data I have submitted proves that the CGMS is medically necessary.
Your second argument is that, “Use of Continuous Glucose Moitoring (CGMS) is not generally accepted by informed health care providers in the United States…” I ask this with genuine wonder: whom do you consider informed medical professionals? The first doctor I saw when I began treatment for diabetes was a respected endocrinologist with 20 years in the field; he told me that he didn’t believe in insulin pumps and would not prescribe one: Anno Domini 2002. The nurse practitioner who works under my current primary care physician told me just one month ago that as a diabetic I could expect to feel ill, even with excellent control (which was flatly contradicted by my Certified Diabetes Educator when I asked her for corroboration.) Are these informed medical professionals? On the other hand, my current endocrinologist at the Dartmouth-Hitchcock Medical Center thinks CGMS is useful, and agrees that in my case it is clearly efficacious. Before I moved to western NH, I received treatment at the Joslin Diabetes Clinic in Boston, MA. Curious, I also emailed them for their official opinion:
When used for the right individuals CGMS can provide excellent information to make strategic clinical decisions. They are especially beneficial in patients who have hypoglycemic unawareness or for those who are trying to fine-tune their treatment regimen…. The Joslin [Clinic] certainly approves of and uses this technology with appropriate patients. (Feedback@joslin.harvard.edu, copy of email attached)
The best-informed diabetes health care providers in the United States accept CGM as a useful, effective medical technology. Therefore, the argument that “CGMS is not generally accepted by informed health care providers in the United States” is not valid.
Next, you state, “Use of Continuous Glucose Monitoring (CGMS)… has not been proven by Medical or Scientific Evidence to be effective in treating the condition, illness, or diagnosis for which its use is proposed.” The primary goal in good diabetes self-care is control over blood glucose levels. My CGMS clearly enables me maintain excellent control of these levels, to an extent I was unable to achieve on finger-sticks. Therefore, it is effective.
Finally, you point out that included in coverage exclusions are, “Services or medications that we determine are Investigational, mainly for research purposes, or Experimental in nature.” The entire diabetes community knows that pregnant women and those with hypoglycemic unawareness are getting approval for these devices. I have a husband and an insulin pump: I possess everything I need to induce either condition. I do not intend to do these things. However, I will not hesitate to approach [the state health insurance commission] and ask them to look into [the health insurance company] to learn if you are approving CGM coverage for anyone at all. They might be interested if you are covering “experimental” devices that “have not been proven… to be effective” for some customers, while denying coverage of those same devices to others - especially if you are approving experiments on pregnant women and ineffective treatment for those with debilitating diabetic side-effects.
I very strongly urge you to reconsider your decision.
Sincerely,
Sunday, 06/01/2008 - Written by Angela at 8:51 am - 4 Comments - Diabetes, Uncategorized - Permalink
I’ve been using the CGM for a year now, and I’ve achieved truly excellent control of my diabetes. So why am I still feeling sick all the time? I went to the doctor Friday to find out. The constant hair loss, never-ending, crushing fatigue, frequent and debilitating headaches, inexplicable weight changes, and just overall feeling ill all the time was supposed to go away or at least improve with better control.
They took some blood to run some tests, but while there my doctor (really a nurse - apparently we don’t have an actual doctor) told me that even with great control I’m still a diabetic and can expect to feel ill at least most of the time.
EXCUSE ME???
Do you have any idea how much time I spend researching and implementing new strategies for improving my health? Or how good I am at it? I think equally with both sides of my brain. Only a very small percentage of people do this, most are biased toward the right or left, and the big benefit of using both to equal advantage is that you are essentially a problem-solving machine. I focus all of this problem-solving power on managing my disease all the time. All. The. Time. ALL THE TIME. And yes, I do expect to see some benefit. Because if I’ll just live longer, well then forget it. Who wants to live 80 years feeling sick as a dog all. the. time?
I wear an instrument of death every single second of every single blessed day. I do not do this for kicks, and I am not ignorant of my options. Insulin is a choice. It is not a necessity. Not all lives are better than none at all. And I have four choices:
I think that a physician who ignores the existence of these options, no matter how well-meaning she may be, is stupid. Just plain stupid. I am not wearing out my brilliance on this disease because I must. And I can stop any time I damn well please.
I am not going to kill myself. But I think I may need to find a new doctor.
Jeremy and I have really been focusing on making an active decision in the presidential election this year, so we’ve been listening to a lot of Vermont Public Radio during our commute. Not because their journalism is balanced, by any stretch of the imagination, but because it’s the only news radio we know that we can get out here.
One of the top issues among candidates this year is health care.
If I hear one more candidate say that “diabetes is costing us too much money,” “diseases like diabetes are out of control,” “we need to control diabetes,” or anything about diabetes being preventable I am going to choke.
Today I finally did call Speaking Candidate a jackass. Loudly. Right into his speaker.
Because, you know, they are NOT talking about Type I diabetes. They are ALWAYS and ONLY talking about Type II, which to a degree is preventable, does have a high correlation with inactivity and diet, does entail a measure of personal responsibility. Meanwhile, since the rest of the nation understands just as little as the candidates about diabetes, what it is, and what it means, I am under attack for “letting” this happen to myself. For “allowing” my body to kill off my beta cells. For costing the rest of you money.
Well I’m sorry, but I’d just like to point out that I’ve sent a lot of people to school with my taxes, and I don’t see a degree hanging on my wall yet! Anyone ignorant enough to swallow this hogwash can just go choke on that!
Jeremy: I have a small surprise for you. It’s over there.
Angela opens the package to find a doughnut: Mmm!
Jeremy: Sue suggested I read The Seven Habits of Highly Effective people. You’ve probably already read it?
Angela: No. ::Chomping on the doughnut:: But I probably do most of them anyway. I do a lot of things by instinct that most people have to learn.
Angela, still chomping away: I’m feeling pretty confident and happy today, can you tell?
Jeremy: Indeed! How could that be?…. Did you know you had a doughnut coming your way?
* * * * * * *
Mmm-mm. Fat and happy. That’s me.
Of course, I practically swallowed that doughnut whole before I even thought about it, and this was supposed to be the night I quit eating early so I could have a clean overnight BG pattern to look at tomorrow morning….
Thursday, 01/24/2008 - Written by Angela at 9:22 pm - No Comments - Diabetes, Our Little World - Permalink
Well, as you can probably imagine, our new HTPC has some quirks. Like, when Jeremy goes on a rampage and rips everything apart, then forgets to plug the satellite remote receiver back in… I can’t watch TV until he gets home and fixes it. This does not happen if you’re just using a signal box and a TV. This also doesn’t happen if you’re a techy. But when little old me is confronted by the Blue Screen of Death with a cryptic message scrawled in a beautiful high-def white letters, let’s just say that I simply ignored the whole thing. I did try to play some music, but Jeremy hasn’t “pointed” Media Center at the music folder on the NAS yet, so it only recognizes songs we’ve actually played so far. It is kind of cool that when you play a song, Media Center recognizes it as music and adds it to your music list. It even goes to look up the CD art and song names for you.
We’re going to be gone for part of the weekend, so I’m trying to get my week’s homework done early. However, in lieu of that tonight, I spent two hours straightening out our health insurance accounts from June 07 to the present. It isn’t good, folks. The company that was administering (as in, the company that was supposed to keep all this straight TO BEGIN WITH!!!) our HRA plan has a quirky way of cooking their books, and they messed up BIG, HUGE-time: it looks like we’re out of pocket about $300 or so, and perhaps some penalties for overspending on our FSA account. Yep. Somebody’s going on a rampage tomorrow, and it’s not Jeremy!
We’re tossing around the idea of billing Upstate Administrative Services for my time. This isn’t the first time I’ve fixed their mistakes… it’s just the first time it’s going to cost me. Or is it? I can yell REALLY loud. Ask anybody how loud Lucy was at Durgee Junior High in 1994.
And that was 14 years ago. I’m bigger now. =)
Monday, 01/21/2008 - Written by Angela at 10:25 pm - 1 Comment - Diabetes, Our Little World, Toys & Gadgets - Permalink